Seeking Freedom: A Shift in Focus

Several years ago, I saw a picture in my mind that I hope to never forget. I saw a man walking along the road with many things piled up on him (symbolizing burdens, struggles, worries, etc.).

He looked very weighed down by them.

He wasn’t focusing on that, though. Instead, he was looking forward in the direction he was walking, and he was following the light he saw ahead (representing God).

As the man walked along the road and focused on the light ahead, the burdens started falling off of him (one by one). The part that surprised me was that he sometimes didn’t even seem to notice when they were falling off of him, because he was so focused on the light ahead.

There were times he did notice something was gone, but he had no idea when it fell off. His focus was on the light. By the time he reached the light, much of what was weighing him down earlier had fallen off.

” But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” Matthew 6:33

The Holy Spirit used that vision to speak directly to my heart. It was such a confirmation to me that I needed to focus on Him, not what I was trying to be set free from. I had spent years trying to be set free from some struggles that brought me great shame. I was also trying to keep this hidden from everybody else, because I thought I was the only one.

It took me some time to really embrace this, but when I started putting my focus on Jesus, (not what I was trying to be set free from) I found deeper healing.

What does it look like to put our focus on whatever we want to change (and not on God)?

I will give you an example from my own life. You may or may not know this part of my story, but many years ago I confessed to my husband that I was watching pornography and I did not know how to stop. I felt such incredible guilt and shame for what I was doing. It took me a very long time to finally tell him, but in doing so, I started the process of healing.

While I most definitely had a measure of responsibility in finding healing for myself and our marriage, I put it all on myself.

I tried to psychoanalyze myself. I read and studied about the subject often. When I wasn’t reading about it, I was thinking about it and trying to figure out how to fix myself. I did all of this in an honest effort to take responsibility for what I had done, but what I ended up doing was (without recognizing this until years later) make it worse.

Reading, learning more, and praying about this certainly wasn’t wrong. I put so much of a focus on it that my identity became wrapped up in it as well. I was praying about this and asking God to heal my heart all the time. It’s pretty much all I prayed about.

It took me a long time to realize that my focus was actually part of my problem.

In all my striving, I put myself into even more bondage.

I finally started to realize what I had done while I was on such a mission to change and make up for the past. I knew my focus needed to change, but I didn’t know how to do that.

This is when I finally started learning how to apply Matthew 6:33 to my life, and I started putting my focus on seeking God, not healing or freedom.

Some days, especially in the beginning, I felt like nothing was happening. I had fears that it would become worse if I didn’t constantly and actively strive for freedom. Sometimes it felt irresponsible to not be focused on it all the time, as if I was living in denial. I wasn’t ignoring it, though. I was actively working through things as they surfaced in my heart.

I can quite honestly tell you, that I was able to look back a year later and realize God was indeed healing my heart as I put my focus on Him. He knew where I needed to start and how to get to the place of freedom I was so desperately wanting.

While I was learning how to develop a more intimate relationship with Jesus, my heart was beginning to heal in deeper ways than I had known was possible.

That was many years ago, and pornography is a topic that I don’t really think too much about anymore, except in reference to helping someone else. It’s totally different now. I am not saying I have done everything perfectly, (I haven’t) but as I continued to focus on Jesus and lay it all down before Him (instead of striving) my heart continued to heal, and I finally experienced what it was like to walk in freedom.

What does it look like to put our focus on God?

I want this post to be practical, so I am giving you examples of what it looked like for me in this particular situation:

I didn’t stop praying for healing and freedom, but I changed the way I prayed about it. Instead of continually asking God to heal me, I thanked Him for what He was doing in my life and thanked Him for the freedom He died for me to have.
When I would feel the urge to start figuring out how to be healed again, I would place it back in God’s hands and thank Him for the work He was doing in my life. Psalm 55:22 says, “Cast your burden on the LORD, and he will sustain you; He will never permit the righteous to be moved”.
For me, it was important to stop studying and reading about the subject for a while. There’s nothing wrong with finding resources to support you along the way, but I found myself using these things much more often than simply turning to God and choosing to trust that He could heal me even if I didn’t understand everything. Revelation given by the Holy Spirit is much more powerful than information written by man.
I asked God to show me what my heart looked like. I surrendered my heart to Him and actively gave Him permission to speak to me about my heart’s condition and to show me whatever I needed to see. The Holy Spirit will show you what you need to see. You don’t have to go digging for it.
My prayer life radically changed as I started praying about many things other than what I was struggling with.
I concentrated on my walk with God. One summer I started walking with God on a trail at a local college. I would walk, pray and listen. Often times, I wouldn’t even talk about the struggles I was having. I might mention them quickly, but then I would spend most of the time praising God for who He is while enjoying the time I was spending with Him.
When I would feel tempted in this area (which will happen), I would start thanking God for the person He created me to be.
I learned how to rest in Him.

These are just a few examples of how we can shift the focus from our problems to fixing our attention on Jesus. Sometimes we can desire freedom and healing above anything, but the best “prize” you could ever have is a deep, intimate walk with Jesus. There is nothing that will satisfy your heart more.